When Time Runs Away From You

March 19, 2017

It feels strange; sitting at my desk, blogging. I haven’t blogged in around 2 months. I haven’t made a YouTube video in the same period of time.

Time has run away from me. In pretty much every aspect of my life. I made a conscious decision in January to take a step back from YouTube and blogging for a few weeks – just until I got on top of everything else in my life. A few weeks turns into a few months relatively easily.

I didn’t want to hit pause on blogging, or making videos. But when you’re stressing out about having to draft a post or prep videos whilst stressing out about writing documentary scripts and journalism portfolios and recording radio programmes, something has to give. Even temporarily. Because realistically, I shouldn’t have been getting stressed about blogging or making videos in the first place – they’re hobbies, that I’m supposed to enjoy doing!

It’s safe to say, I’ve been hella busy. 2017 is moving forward at a hundred miles per hour and I feel as though I have very little time to do anything, let alone the things I enjoy. I’ve been incredibly career-focused since the start of the year – although it’s paying off and I’m learning lots whilst making valuable connections, it’s leaving me exhausted. The sad part is that I’m actually loving everything I’m doing – except the college work!

In addition to my college coursework (which, by the end of May, will have consisted of a journalism portfolio, a group documentary, 3 solo documentaries, a podcast and my own website) I’m also still working 2 days per week. As well as that, I’ve undertaken some freelance work designing publicity materials for a large organisation, which could give me serious credibility points if all goes well. I’m volunteering 2 nights per week in hospital radio; one of those is doing the admin work, and the other is hosting a 2-hour live request show. Plus, I now also have my own show on college radio 1 night per week. That show might only be an hour long, but the prep that goes into it (scripting, sorting music etc) can be up to another 3 hours during the week beforehand.

Can you understand why I haven’t been online as much?

That being said, it’s not without fruition – I’ve had 2 conditional offers for 3rd year university! The thought of going back to uni terrifies me, I won’t lie – and I haven’t decided whether I’m going yet. There are other avenues that I’m looking at too – but if those don’t work out, then I’ll be heading to The University of the West of Scotland to study Broadcast Production for a year or two. I’m hoping to specialise in radio production, which is even more terrifying as I’ll be surrounded by people who have specialised in radio for 2 years already. I don’t like being the one that doesn’t know what they’re doing!

This week, I’ve been a little more aware of how much effort I’m putting into everything – so I’ve taken back some time for myself. I went to the salon and got my hair done on Thursday (honestly, I had 11 week roots). I’ve played my PS2 for an hour or so a couple of nights. I went out shopping with my sister. Simple, self-care tasks. Things like doing my laundry just haven’t been happening, purely because I have no time to iron everything. My room is a mess (although some would argue it’s always a mess). At times, I haven’t been eating properly – because I’m rushing from place to place. Now that I’ve finished with one of my classes, I have an extra day to catch up on everything else.

I’m also looking at holidays. I’m visiting London with my boyfriend in May for an event, and we’ll probably be there again in August for another event just before my birthday. I’m looking into visiting Japan next year too – but I really want to get away for a week once my college course is finished – just to get away from everything. To recharge my batteries. But before I can plan that, I’ve got a hen party to sort, and a birthday party to plan. One of those is mine, you can hopefully tell which one!

I need to get some balance back in my life. And I’ll get it somehow! But first, I’ve got a script to finish…

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